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First off, self-proclaimed people-pleasers have a special place in my heart. A lot of the students who I’ve supported as emerging social workers struggle with people-pleasing.
I feel like it shows the extent to which humans can go to show care and protection for others even if it jeopardizes us in ways we know and may not know. I've learned that you probably don't want to be doing as much bending as you are so here are the 3 exercises to try.
What principles guide you? By articulating the values that we choose for ourselves, we cause use those values in times of decision-making or when we’re unsure of what is the “best choice” aligned with our integrity, as defined by us.
Need help with this? Check out How to turn Values into Action
I feel like this exercise could be useful for those of us who can be our own worst critic and believe that every negative thing we think is true. This exercise asks, “what proof do you have to think these things?”
While for some, positive vibes and thinking may be the magic pill to help manage their worries, for others it’s facing those worst-case scenarios and considering how we might respond that helps to activate that inner knowing and resilience.
The content of these emails range from short pep talks, long rants, timely reminders, love letters for the collective, and invitations to work with me deeper.
I love sending these emails and people seem to like 'em too. . .
🗣️ "This is so inclusive it makes my heart swell, Petra!! I feel so welcomed into your space, and I really admire how intentional you are about identifying who you are making space for, and why. Actually feeling a bit teary, I’m so moved!"
🗣️"I open your emails because I enjoy your perspective and writer's voice. I like your memes, gifs and formatting. Your content is affirming and reinforcing. I can't get enough of liberatory discussion and being connected to folx doing the work."
🗣️"I subscribe to far more email lists than I have time to read. But when I open your messages, it's because I love your energy and your mission. We share the goal of wanting to participate in collective liberation, and the words you use to describe your work help me shape changes I want to make in my own business & practices."
🗣️"I read your emails because your content, mission, and vision are both important and special. Seeing your content in general reminds me of so many things that I forget to do or think about in my day to day walk and it’s very refreshing. "